There are two things that amazed me from last night’s show: how beautiful Bob’s new baby grandson is and how obsessed Nathan is with the Walk! After last week’s Walk (which really gave him no control at all) I am surprised he went back for more.
But he got away with it cheaply, winning immunity for only 124 calories. I guess I could argue that if he focused on controlling the controllables – his diet and exercise – he wouldn’t need immunity. But I accept that we’re getting to that point in the game where no-one is safe, really.
Something that didn’t surprise me last night (even if it did break my heart) was the little meltdown Sammy had in the gym. Michelle was pressing her buttons when, in a one-on-one boxing session, she told her to punch for every time she’s been the ‘funny fat girl'.
Those punches were flying, let me tell you! It’s very therapeutic to be able to let your anger go like that in a workout. But what was heartbreaking about the session was when Michelle asked Sammy to tell her one good thing about herself.
Not only did she struggle, she just couldn’t find the words. Although the boys (Nathan, Andrew and Cameron) were calling out things like, “Use it Sammy” and “We love you Sammy”, she hid behind her boxing gloves, a little girl lost.
I found this so touching because I remember what it’s like to not be able to name one good thing about myself. Of course other people can always name 10 good things about you, but you’re blinded by a lot of pain when you can’t see those things in yourself.
And as Sammy said, she knows where Michelle is trying to take her by pushing these issues, but she’s just not there yet.
Her confession about lying about her eating habits was an important first step. And Sammy is not alone in this. There is a lot of secret eating that goes on when you’re overweight and, although it sometimes brings momentary pleasure, it fuels an awful lot of shame.
Michelle’s right when she says Sammy has to work on her self-image and stop seeing herself as a ‘fat girl’. But that’s a long process, one that will extend way beyond the house. For example, it’s taken me almost a year to stop seeing the ‘fat girl’ in my bedroom mirror even though I’ve successfully maintained the 50kg I lost.
Until then, Sammy just needs to keep punching away the pain and do positive things – such as eating well, exercising and being kind to herself – that bolster her self-worth.
I'm looking forward to the seeing the outcome of Nathan's Walk on tonight's episode. It's peculiar that he's taking it on his own... can't be a good thing in Loser land is all I have to say! Be sure to tune in tonight at 7PM on TEN and then check your inbox in the morning for my daily update.
Episode 34 highlights
If you missed last night's show, you can watch the full episode at The Biggest Loser TV show website.
My favourite segment is where Sammy talks about being honest about her eating habits...
And because I'm a sucker for beautiful new babies, I'm going to do some bragging on behalf of Bob! You can see his gorgeous new grandson in the segment below: